MOTIVATION NEEDED. NO CONDEMNS !!

Today I really have a fresh mind, fresh day, all kind about freshy things..
Having a cup of coffee and a book "How To Lead, Landing in the Executive Chair" by Linda Henman,,

That's why I write again after a long time I left it..

Ya Allah lama rasanya tak menulis. 

Don't know where is my spirit and motivation goes..

All has gone since I had completed my master's degree..

I don't know why I am really being lazy and lazy and lazy for these two semesters which I'm almost done..

If you want to know, for the past semester I have done, I just serahkan dekat takdir secara membuta-tuli

without any effort, only a little bit..

Malam nak exam baru nak bukak buku, pagi nak exam rasa macam my mind going burst.. I let my three subjects go through without having any enthusiasm, passion, excitement.

  

I just want to past those subjects, and alhamdulillah Allah fulfilled my prayer and desire..

What made me realized, I am an exam-oriented person which made me far away from being a good and excellent person.

arghhh so annoying having this kind of feeling, character and attitude.

I feel like the most worthless person on the planet who is incapable to control myself, my nafs, demand, desire and everything. sooo useless..

And what really worse is I want to run from being myself which impossible for me to do this.. hahahaha.

.

But Alhamdulillah, it was...!!

Thankful to Allah who has really blessed me.. I had found and met a really special friend and a person who was motivating me, giving inspiration to me, and the most important thing is, she never look down on me.

She taught me how to be a good leader, a good speaker. How can I speak fluently in English and Arabic. How to have a good idea and opinion.

I have to change myself and my mindset to be someone better, a productive one.. I need to admire and respect myself.. and I want my parent, future husband and children being proud having me in their life..

Therefore, I started to turnaround three-hundred-and-sixty degree back by reading and writing again..

Alhamdulillah, 2 more research paper and 1 book review to go to complete my second semester and please pray for me. I really need your sincerely prayer  😇

#GOTjourney